December 30, 2013

I had dreams of a little girl on toward morning. 

I'll have to tackle those tangled locks.

Yesterday 

I ploughed ahead and finished a first draft of my prose book, What Next, Miss Mommy?  I waited till late in the day to print, read it and edit.

The book draft is dismaying – a huge disappointment that displays both redundancy and gaping holes – much work remains to be done. But I guess that’s what first drafts are for, and at least I got a poem out of it – a poem titled "Redundancies and Gaping Holes."

As I sit here at dawn, I realize that she who came into my dreams was Laura. Furthermore I realize I never did know how to untangle her or her hair – and she wouldn’t let me touch it.

I am heartened. Laura knows what I’m doing. She wants to do it herself.

Back then, when she was 5 or 6 there was a terrible standoff, and I had to hurt her: Without scissors I had to get rid of the matted tangle at the nape of her neck. Tears were shed.

Once I’d done so, I gave her the hairbrush and said, “You’re on your own from now on, babe.”

Laura needs to write the book.